Wanna improve your love relationship?
Of course, who doesn’t?
To love and to be loved is one of the most basic human needs. Your intimate relationship is not only a predictor of your overall happiness. It has been proven by a 70-year long research at Harvard University that your long-term health depends on the quality of your love relationships.
To have a deeply fulfilling relationship both the partners need to constantly put their efforts towards improving their relationship. In order to improve your relationship day in and day out you need to set some relationship goals. Having comprehensive relationship goals give you a target worth striving for. Even if you are unable to fulfill these goals 100% of the time the journey of striving for your relationship goals is always fruitful and rewarding.
Being in a relationship for more than a decade I have realized that it’s all about the effort. If one or both the partners are willing to put in the effort to improve their relationship the relationship will definitely flourish. I think that the following 9 relationship goals are worth striving for.
Make Each Other A Priority
The most important relationship goal is making each other a priority. When you are in a relationship what matters the most is not what you are getting but what you are giving. Whatever you give in a relationship comes back to you sooner or later.
By making your partner a priority you not only give importance to him or her but also give importance to what is important to them.
Appreciate Each Other Privately & Publically
A happy and fulfilling relationship runs on appreciation. You feel cherished and valued when appreciated. It is human psyche to adore appreciation and try to get it again and again. Appreciate your significant other for all the positive things he or she does for you and they will do all it takes to get that appreciation again and again.
Private appreciation is effective but if you want to pick up your game, appreciate your partner publically. Public appreciation not only makes your partner extremely happy it inspires everybody around you.
In the early days of a relationship both the partners are fully attentive and they quickly notice the tiniest of changes in each other. Over time they may become complacent and begin to take each other for granted. As a result, they are less and less attentive with the passage of time. But the thing is we humans need to feel seen and without due attention, a relationship starts to deteriorate.
Make it a motto to pay attention when your partner is around. Listen with your ears and hearts. Show your partner that you see him or her. Daily notice at least one good thing your partner does for you and appreciate it. Within days you will start seeing the benefits of paying attention.
Validate Each Other’s Feelings
In order to feel loved both of you need to feel heard, seen and understood. The easiest way to feel heard, seen and understood is by validating each other’s feelings.
At times we all can be unreasonable and you or your partner are no exception to this fact. You might feel that your partner’s feelings are unreasonable or disproportionate but the thing is in order to validate something you do not need to agree to it. Just tell your partner that you see their feeling and ask how you may help to make them feel better.
Be a Team
When you are in a relationship you are a team, therefore, you should behave like a team. There is no competition between you two. Support each other and be each other’s cheerleader. Cover up each other’s mistakes in front of others. Do not talk bad about each other because it will weaken your team.
Keep Knowing About Each Other
After being in a relationship for some time you might assume that you know everything or at least a lot about your partner. But the thing is all of us keep on changing with the passage of time.
Your partner’s dreams, goals, likes, and dislikes may change and in order to know your partner well, you need to keep knowing him or her. When both of you will know about each other’s goals, dreams likes and dislikes you will feel connected. Ask each other questions, be interested in the answers. Remember the answers and contemplate about them to know your partner even better.
Set a Daily Connection Time
Being in a relationship is all about feeling emotionally connected to your partner. In order to foster the feeling of connection and togetherness in your relationship, you must give your relationship the gift of time. Nothing can replace you two in the relationship that’s why without ample connection time you feel disconnected from your partner.
Set a daily connection time and talk to each other in that time. Pay attention, listen with your heart and catch up what you have missed during the day.
Let Go of Each Other’s Mistakes
To err is human and both of you will make mistakes in your relationship. And when you or your partner will make mistakes only forgiveness can rescue you. Easier said than done but you need to let go of your partner’s mistakes.
When you are seriously offended and hurt you might tend to keep a grudge against your partner. But the thing is having a resentment is toxic for your health, relationship, and happiness. Both of you need to find a mechanism regarding how you will proceed when one of you has made a mistake and the other one is hurt.
Handle Your Differences With Kindness
Having differences in a relationship is inevitable. No matter how deep and strong your relationship is you will end up having at least a few differences and disagreements in your relationship.
At the time of having a disagreement, you need to remember only one thing, be KIND.
Every emotion including anger, frustration, and disappointment can be expressed with kindness. And when you do use kindness while communicating your concerns it takes out the sting out of your argument and your partner is more likely to respond positively.
Being in a successful relationship is all about improving the relationship day in and day out. In order to improve your relationship, you need to pursue some relationship goals. The topmost relationship goal is to make each other a priority. Similarly appreciating each other, validating each other’s feelings, paying attention to each other and forgiving each other easily is essential for a happy and flourishing relationship. When you are in a relationship you are in a team and you need to behave like a team. Having a daily connection time helps in knowing each other better and handling the differences with kindness are the ultimate relationship goals anybody may strive for.
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